An Open Letter to Anne Lamont

Let me bypass over your obvious elitist condescension (filled with horror and disgust at the notion of deliberating with Chuck Grassley are you? Curious that, and seriously, how jejune is the obligatory Sarah Palin dig?), your ignorance of our Constitution, and get right to the heart of the matter. Barack Obama promised you what was not his to give and you were a fool to accept the promise. What did he promise? You think he promised you healthcare, but what he promised you was my property. If I am a taxpayer, he promised you my money and my children's money. If I am a buyer of Treasury bonds, like the Chinese government, he promised you my nation's resources. If I am a doctor, he promised you my expertise and attention - again my property. If I invented a medical device, he promised you my property. If I am a shareholder in a pharmaceutical company, he promised you my money. If I am an inventor of future medical technology, he promised you the fruits of my toil. Again, it was not his to promise and I will not relinquish it. That is why you will be left heartbroken and it is your own fault. You wouldn't offer to sell you house to a person with no money to buy it and you wouldn't trust your life to a stranger, so why would accept this empty promise? It is foolish to count on a promise that cannot be met.

I'll make it easy for you by framing things in your puerile puppy love analogy. It is not Republicans that are saying "we're just not that into you." It's Americans. We got on that couch and looked at that adorable guy too, and when he tried to advance, aggressively, to the heavy petting stage, we had second thoughts. This is not what we bargained for. We came to the couch in a fit of pique, emotionally drained from recent experience, and lured by the siren song. Now, however, we are back to thinking rather than feeling and emoting. Now we realize we should have stayed away.

This is the real world honey. We live with finite resources and almost infinite complexity. Learn how to live in such a world and stop placing faith in leaders to wave a wand and make things just so. Stop trafficking in feel-good, utopian pap and get educated.

Sincerely,
Donny Baseball
Unwilling Underwriter of your Utopian Dreams

P.S. And by the way, what the hell are founding parents?