Hilarious CNN Contortionism on Economy

CNN is applying the recession theme blitzkrieg today, giving you ample opportunity to learn of America's deep economic woe (you can even check out the personal stories of Americans who are struggling). But most of the pimping of recession is comical. You can read about "the shadow job crisis" (unironically placed right near a link to a story about how ADP says employment numbers were up in March). The shadow crisis is that oldie but goodie of media bias, "underemployment." Ignore the unemployment numbers they say, it is underemployment, people not satisfied with the amount of work they have, that should worry you. Here's a lovely specimen of the nuttiness:
"In addition, a rapidly increasing number of people are being forced to take more than one job. There were 161,000 more workers in February who held more than one part-time job than there were in January. One economist said this is a further indication of how bad the market is.
'Basically, this is a sign that we're in a recession,' said David Wyss, chief economist for Standard & Poor's."
Got that. Lots of people actually have TWO OR MORE JOBS, thus we are in a recession. Funny, I thought hard times were characterized by people not being able to find ANY work. I've said it before and I'll say it again, at 4.8% unemployment, full-time employers have only the least employable left to choose from, it is highly likely that they will forgo adding to their ranks from this group. Also, in the last few years, employers likely added alot of people who didn't cut the mustard. Many of these people will not be retained as parts of the economy slow. This is totally normal and relatively meaningless when talking about the economy in aggregate. This is some world-class stretching to fit the pre-determined theme. Congratulations CNN.

Bonus, you can read about a custom shirtmaker in Houston whose "recession tale" means that they won't grow 10% selling $300 shirts like they did last year. Times is hard. Times is hard.

UPDATE: So, I checked out all of these real tales of woe "in their own words." Turns out not one of these people is experiencing anything close to real hardship. The most common gripe is inflation, rising food and gas prices. Seems like CNN doesn't know the difference between inflation and recession. What horrible reporting.